Woe Be Gone

November 26, 2008 § 1 Comment

Alert every feminist, I don’t wear this label on my sleeve, but I am struck sharp across my face with the awareness of being a female at least of late.

Bleeding Lavale with the kernel in tow! The blood-letting of green paper through my nose, stress-spending, in the past 6 months has set me back enough to consider selling my guitar. So I thought to myself, screw stress and the oh-so-important big brand in bad Bombay, small self, flashy socialite, corporate high tea, peanut-pay job thing. Let’s go to a lovely place with nice people and interesting work with time to stare at astral bodies hanging in the sky. Ergo Goa, for at least 2 months doing an infinitely reassuring job and leading a seemingly restoring life.

Packed my bags and after loads of deliberation, I picked my address close to my office. But, trouble follows me. This is not a feeling of being victimized, rather like an ant under a magnifying glass.

This could be me on holiday, after making a safe choice based on the conviction that life could be inexpensive, easy and maybe even comfortable in Goa. What was I thinking! From a perfectly well planned, much anticipated and hugely needed time-out, my time here has become a pain in the arse in every sense. Basically, liars, incompetent fools and lazy administrators persist.

To cut a long story short, the past week has been a harassing saga featuring two of my  friends staying in different rooms floating on a hippie cloud, one psycho Spiderman aspirant backed by a family of blood brothers, two women who are testament to the myth of the liberated woman and a large group of corporate comrades who are socially, ethically and morally willing to offer support with friends peppering the mix. The politics and power play with female protagonists in the story was still between the men. What a joke, this empowerment!

Talking of jokes…

In this drama, considering the girls’ private space was violated with their sense of independence challenged, at a rented property owned by women, the real struggle occurred between one reasonably powerful man with his hired employees and the boys, who trespass property with indisputably sexual/adolescent intentions to “get close to a girl.” At 2.30 in the night, what other reason can a young boy who is suspiciously absent during the day have, for scaling balconies with doors to rooms housing single girls? To any logical person, this would be a clear case of a lapse in security and a threat to females in general. But, apparently it’s a case for the ‘adults’ to point out the carelessness (agreed) and the fragility of so called women’s liberation. It is easy to think like a man and say this is not a gender issue, and maybe the landlady is right in suggesting “you girls should go home.” Why work and earn your economic independence at the cost of exposure to psychotic males of your species? How can we inferior females inconvenience a society divided upon doing the right thing and the convenient thing? After all we were divided too, between our loyalties to self and our ideologies, but we’re liberated, educated, empowered women, we should know when to stop expecting to be treated like human beings by everybody. It would be best to move out and leave this problem with the place. Or is it?

Whatever, this incident was an experience worth having, and people worth knowing. Entertainment.

The whole weekend to date, has been a series of extremes for me. Being broke on Friday to spending more than I can afford at the Saturday Nite market; bored to death through the week and entertained since then with free movies at IFFI each day; lonely in a very lost cause kind of way to way too much socializing over the past few days. On one side are 2 girls who assert leaving the balcony open is ok (fair enough but imprudent considering emancipation is just a word), and on the other 2 women who think with their wallets and nose hair suggesting young girls who leave home are “asking for it.” Similarly, a patronizing yet well-meaning man with power and intellect with a host of manpower with a boy-man who has an incredible sense of right and wrong, contrasted by a group of brothers from an oppressed minority tribe protecting their psychotic, balcony-scaling brother. Another case, an ex-boyfriend acts menopausal with his delusions of grandeur while a paavam guy sends me free flight tickets with nearly no expectations in return, both from foreign shores without any encouragement from me. Sigh! It’s been a week of total opposites in culture, power, gender, social situation, even god damn conversation. I think it’s time I escaped my life.

On a personal note, the part I won’t talk about. One would think, being in a situation would warrant participation, but I discover though I’m in the spot by association, I receive the maximum exposure to all parties involved, maximum trauma, maximum impact and maximum time lost. I always wished I was Sherlock, Don Quixote or in a more romantic term the leading lady. But, recently I’ve noticed I’m always Watson, Sancho Panza or the girl who offers her bicycle to the runaway bride in a romantic comedy. Inconsequential but crucial.

That wraps up one episode of ranting. There’s a heck of a lot more than I want to handle right now. But, I’m still thrilled about IFFI, GGs and losing weight. I wish I was a palm tree though.

 

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